New Students
by purplefishcake
Summary: Four students have been accepted by a random school and then expelled soon after. I wonder why...
1. Seigaku

**A/N: My first attempt in writing a Prince of Tennis fanfic. This idea kinda popped-up when I was role-playing with Vix! Or AquaWatercrest to you people. Well, enjoy! Oh, and flames are welcome **

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Eiji and Fuji sat next to each other during class, waiting for their teacher. They were playing a very enjoyable game of chess which they got from an old man who passed out in front of the school. No, this is not called thievery, this is the art of borrowing. Yes, borrowing is an art. Why do you think some thieves are successful in robbery? No, they just borrowed all those things…And forgot to return them…Ah who cares. Thieves don't really matter in this story…I think.

The teacher who was clearly very late entered the class…Covered with crayon drawings.

"Sensei, were you attacked by rapid kindergarteners again?" Fuji asked, smirking.

The teacher suddenly started to cuss and was soon taken to the mental institute by gay people in uniform.

Everyone rejoiced until the next teacher came in. "Class, please welcome your new friend. She's a transfer student from Who-Knows-Where. Be nice to her and please don't try to pull any pranks on her, according to her guardian, she's very childish and you if you value your life you shouldn't make fun of her, understand?"

Fuji smirked. "This should be fun," he thought.

Eiji noticed his evil grin and scooted away from him.

"Please come in, Turquise-san," the teacher said.

They waited but no-one came in. "Er…Turquise-san?"

"…I'M LOST!!!"

* * *

The teacher greeted his students with a smile before announcing some news.

"You have a new friend today. Please come in, Aqua-san."

A girl with blue hair and eyes entered the class.

"Please introduce yourself, Aqua-san."

"My name is Aqua Watercrest, nice to meet you. (She looks like Vix's avatar…Kind of)"

"Anything else about yourself you would like to add? Hobbies, preferences, siblings?" inquired the teacher.

"I have an older brother who is a doctor. He's working in Germany now. I am living with my friends whose parents are away on business trips. There's Turquise, my best friend, she's also very childish and forgetful; Tsubasa, a plant-addict and a tofu-enarian and Turquise's torturee and there's Kaji: an idiot who loves to swear and dolls. He is also my torturee. Yes, I have the right to torture him because I am a licensed torturer."

The teacher nodded his head before asking Aqua to sit beside our favorite stoic captain of a certain tennis team. The teacher began class.

"…I'M LOST!!!" echoed through the school.

Aqua sighed before a girl with long blonde hair and amber eyes stormed into the class. "Aqua! I'm lost again!" she shouted.

Aqua sighed again before replying. "Turquise, remember what I told you before about—never mind, we all know that you've forgotten already by now. Anyways, take a wrong turn and then another wrong turn and another wrong turn and just go straight. You'll reach your class eventually."

"Okay!" she said joyfully before leaving the class.

"A few wrong turns?" Tezuka asked.

"She forgot which side is right and which is left."

"Ah."

* * *

Kaji entered his new class. He regretted not waking up earlier that morning. If he had woken up earlier, Aqua wouldn't have to use that flamethrower to burn one of his precious dolls.

"Hello you *bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*ing people, my *bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*ing name is Kaji. I'd rather not mention my last name or else Aqua will change it again."

Everyone winced from the swearing. "Do you mind not swearing?" Kawamura asked humbly.

"Yes, I do mind."

"Okay," he said before a tennis racquet was handed to him, "BURRRRRRRNNIIIIIIINNG! STTTOPP SWWWWEEEEAAARRINNG!! COME ON, BABY!"

"I will not stop swearing and I am not a baby, I am a normal teenager with swearing problems and is in a bad mood because of an incident this morning."

The racquet was taken away. "Okay."

Everyone sweat-dropped before the teacher chose a seat for him and started class with a lecture on sweat-drops and how they are unhealthy for the human brain for some illogical reason.

* * *

"Class, we have a new student joining us today, please treat him well and try not to hurt him in any way, understand?" he asked the class.

The class nodded except for our favourite viper-like friend. He hissed. That was probably why they call him 'Viper' but it might also be his scary snake-like eyes. Why they call him that, we might never know. Meh, let's just search for the answer later on Google. You can find almost everything…Fine, EVERYTHING there.

The teacher beckoned the new student to enter the class. Unlike the other new student, he wasn't lost and he entered the classroom with a potted plant in his hand.

Everyone stared at the plant that was in the brown-haired boy's hands. "Ohayo, minna-san! I'm Tsubasa, nice to meet you!"

They paid no notice to the boy, just the plant in his hands.

"Why did you bring that plant to school?" someone asked.

"Well, I enjoy gardening and it's not safe at home," Tsubasa answered.

'Someone' nodded his head. "I see, the bugs will get them, right?"

"What?" Tsubasa gasped, "The bugs won't get them! They'll explode along with my plants!"

… The class became silent and confused.

"What do you mean by 'explode'?" the teacher asked.

"At home, Turquise will either explode my greenhouse or burn it down to ashes. If neither, it's probably Aqua using it as a base to burn down Kaji's dolls or a base for a campfire."

Everyone nodded their heads except for Kaidoh who, once again, hissed.

The teacher seated him beside Kaidoh and continued on with his lecture.

* * *

"Echizen! Don't forget that we have tennis practice today!" Momoshiro called out. You know, his name is too long. I'll just call him 'Momo' so that I can save time by not typing the last five letters of his last name.

"Hai, Momo-senpai."

The two went off to the guy's tennis courts and carefully avoiding the girls'. They don't know if they're going to ambush them and probably eat them later. But, the people there aren't cannibals, so that means that they are safe…Or so I think.

Tezuka looked at Momo and Ryoma. "You're late."

"Sorry, Tezuka-buchou, we ran into a couple of cannibals," Momo explained.

Tezuka glared at them. "It's not nice to call the girls in the girls' tennis team cannibals."

Momo laughed before explaining, "It's not that, Tezuka-buchou. We ran into a couple of cats and Eiji-senpai and Eiji-senpai was pretending to eat the cats. Since he often says 'Nya', people can take him as a cat easily."

Tezuka nodded. He noticed the new student that was sitting beside him standing behind the fence, muttering to herself. If she had a notebook with her and is a boy, she could pass off as Inui.

Aqua noticed Tezuka and waved to him. "May I watch you guys practice?"

Tezuka nodded.

"My friends want to watch too."

He nodded again. I'm pretty sure that he won't ever say anything when approving something and just nod his head. Is he a life-sized bobble-head?

Aqua took a deep breath before shouting, "Kaji's trying to kill me and he's also trying to exterminate bunnies!"

Tezuka became a little confused before Turquise came running up to her. "Aqua! Are you okay? Where's Kaji?! He's going to get a piece of my mind once I find him."

Aqua pointed her finger to the centre of the tennis court. "Don't worry, Turquise, I've already tied him to that stake, I just wanted you to come as soon as possible and watch them play. No bunnies are in any danger whatsoever."

Turquise breathed a sigh of relief before walking onto the court behind Aqua.

"You must be Turquise-san," said a brown-haired tennis genius.

Turquise gasped. "STRANGER!!!"

Aqua sighed and patted Turquise on the back. "Don't worry, Turquise. He isn't a stranger; he's Fuji, remember?"

"Ack! Mountains can take the form of humans and they know our names!"

Aqua sweat-dropped. "Err...No, we were in the Torturer's Academy together, remember? He was the one I was sharing torturing notes with and he was the one who came up with the plan of match-making Kaji and a rock."

"Oh...No. I don't remember."

"Meh, if you don't remember now, then you never will and me trying to remind you will be hopeless."

"Yep."

"So, I haven't seen you in a while, how have you been? Still torturing Kaji, I see," Fuji said, looking at Kaji who was tied to a stake.

Aqua nodded her head. "Still torturing your teammates?"

Fuji nodded as well before pointing to gallons of Inui juice in a corner. "They don't like its taste. In fact, they get sick from just drinking a sip. Its taste is nothing compared to the Nuriko Special."

Inui heard this and came up to them. "Nuriko Special?"

"Yes, it's the name of our drink that is so horrible that it makes dead people come back to life and vice versa," Aqua explained.

"I see." And thus, Aqua and Inui began exchanging notes on the ingredients needed to make each drink before TEzuka made them run laps because of chatting with them during practice. Aqua and Turquise then sat down on benches that was soon drawn on by Turquise with crayons like she did with the teacher earlier on that morning.

"You know, they're not as good as your brother and their training doesn't seem as hard as what we've done," Turquise commented when she finished her drawing. I pity the people who were supposed to clean up later.

"Yeah, I know," Aqua replied, "Hey, I've got this great idea! Why don't we help train them?!"

"Sure!" Turquise said, practically jumping from excitement.

Aqua got up and went over to here Tezuka was ordering laps to people who we don't know.

"Tezuka-san, is it okay if we help train them? I mean, we've got nothing to do, besides, we have trained too but the training my brother gave us was quite tough, but still," Aqua said.

Tezuka nodded yet again.

"Yay! I'll go call Turquise and Tsubasa!"

As soon as she called them, they asked Tezuka another question, "Where do you keep the baseballs?"

"This is tennis, not baseball," he replied.

"I know that, but baseballs are much harder than tennis balls!" said Turquise.

Tezuka had no answer to the girl's comment and pointed to the storage shed somewhere on that piece of land that none of us knows where for some strange reason.

It was their turn to nod their heads before proceeding to the shed.

They came back soon after with baseballs in baskets in their hands. Aqua dropped her basket on the floor and clapped her hands to get everyone's attention, but then she didn't feel like clapping hands anymore and began whistling and then she got tired of that and said "Kaboom."

Something or someplace far away exploded and everyone turned to her.

"Right, my friends and I will be training you all for a while! So our first practice is to run around the court with a racquet and we'll be aiming baseballs at different places and you have to return the balls we throw at you and aim them at Kaji over there who is tied to a stake," Aqua said, pointing towards a weeping Kaji.

Everyone ran laps and tried to reach the balls with their racquets. Apparently, Inui had made the offer of giving the person who had failed the exercise Inui juice.

Since baseballs are much harder than tennis balls (according to Vix), many got injured and sent to the hospital. Because many students were sent to the hospital, the principal expelled the people who were behind all this.

Aqua, Turquise, Tsubasa and Kaji were expelled from Seigaku and when Aqua's brother heard about this and transfered them to another school. Before doing so, he sent a bottle of Inui juice to the principal who thought it was orange juice and drank it.

He was sent to the hospital after that and was never heard of again. Mostly because everyone forgot about him. He wasn't really all that important, you know. He's pretty useless.

When he was discharged from the hospital, either Turquise or Aqua said 'Kaboom' and the principal exploded into a million and twelve pieces.

The End...For now.

* * *

**A/N: Ehehe…Yes, I know that this is a strange fic, but I enjoy writing things that don't make sense. Well, to me they don't. Anyways, I'd also like to warn you that Aqua and Turquise and Tsubasa and Kaji are Mary-Sues. Well, Aqua and Turquise are. Kaji and Tsubasa are the male version of a Mary-Sue that I don't know what he's called. Also, I'd like to apologize if the ending seems a bit rushed.**

**PLEASE REVIEW!!!**


	2. Rikkaidai

**A/N: The second chapter~**

"Aw, Mitsukake (1)! Do we have to go to school again?! I mean, we just got kicked out because of torturing Kaji and they were scared that this incident will make students leave the school! But what's so wrong about a torturer torturing her torturee?"

Mitsukake slapped his forehead. "It's not normal for people to torture other people! Does it kill you to be normal?!"

"It's not my fault that the people here have a strange sense of what is normal or not! You know, I would've fit in better in Mars with all those Martians! I would think that they're strange, beat them up, and commence world domination! It's simple, really. And then they'll all be mine and Turquise's servants," replied Aqua.

Turquise coughed in the background.

"Oh fine, mine, Turquise's _and_ Turquise's rabbit's servants," Aqua corrected.

"Doesn't matter, you need to go to school either way."

"Yes, but I've graduated from Harvard eight times! Why do I still need to go to school?" Aqua asked.

"I don't care what you do at school but as long as you stay in school, I'll be happy and will treat you to candy later," said Mitsukake.

Aqua rolled her eyes. "But we have a not-so-secret secret stash of chocolates and candy somewhere in my room!"

"O who cares?! Just go to school and create havoc and get expelled already!!" Mitsukake shouted as he threw Aqua, Turquise, Kaji and Tsubasa out the car.

"Aqua, should we drive the people crazy today?" Turquise asked with her all-to-innocent smile.

Aqua smirked in reply.

"I'm taking that as a yes," Tsbasa said, "What do you have in mind?"

"First things first," she said as she forced Kaji into a puffy dress and pushed him into a random puddle and jumped on him, "DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE!"

After five minutes and eight seconds of this, she jumped off him and answered Tsubasa's question.

"Well…"

* * *

"Class, you have a new student today, please welcome him into our school family!" the teacher said.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" Tsubasa shouted.

"What's wrong, is something the matter?" the teacher asked, worried.

Tsubasa was on the floor, sobbing violently. "My…My…My pet tree…Got…Got eaten by…By a…By an ANT! AN ANT I TELL YOU! AN ANT!!! Why are ants so cruel?!"

The teacher got him up and, to forget about his beloved tree, told him that everyone in their class will do anything and everything he wants them to.

Tsubasa smiled before going back to his seat and angsting over his dead tree.

* * *

"Our school now has four new transfer students and we have one of them in our class," the teacher said.

Marui and Niou were talking amongst themselves about their correction ink and the amount of girly pictures that they drew on their desks.

"Please come in, Aqua-san."

Aqua came in (I don't have to describe her anymore, right?) and introduced herself.

"My name is Aqua and I'm a licensed torturer, so if I torture any one of you, don't be surprised."

The class nodded before hearing someone outside call Aqua's name.

Aqua ran toward the window and shouted back, "MITSUKAKE! JUST SHUT UP ALREADY! I'M ALREADY AT SCHOOL AND I'M TRYING TO GET ANOTHER TORTUREE! WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT ME TO DO BESIDES TO NOT GET ANOTHER TORTUREE AND BEAT YOU UP LATER?! AND NO! I'M NOT GOING TO GIVE YOU ANY ONE OF MY CHOCOLATES!"

Everyone in her class became momentarily deaf and then strained their ears to hear what Mitsukake will reply.

"Aqua, I'd just like to inform you that it's your turn to take care of Turquise tonight. This time, please don't let her go anywhere near my tools so that she could operate on people again. Remember the last time you did that? I had to open the annoying salesmen's stomachs to fix them up again. AND DON'T LET HER NEAR KAJI'S DOLLS HOLDING A CHAINSAW OR FLAMETHROWER!"

By the time he had finished all that, Aqua had already shut the window with duct-tape and sticking a piece of paper with the words 'SHUT UP OR DIE!' on it to the window.

Marui and Niou looked at each other before another teacher had entered the class in panic and covered in doodles shouting something about sanity, trees and crayons. They were startled by Aqua's voice behind them saying, "Shoot. I forgot to confiscate her crayons."

* * *

Turquise entered her new classroom 1-B.

"Hello! I'm Turquise!" she said before walking over to where the homeroom teacher was.

"Yes, Turquise-san? Is there anything wrong?" the teacher asked.

"Why am I in the first year?!"

"Because you were put in here by fate…And the principal."

Turquise sulked in a corner before she went back to her place in front of the teacher. "Then, may I doodle?"

"Doodle?" the teacher asked, confused. Her classmates behind her were confused as well.

Turquise opened her bag and took out a box of crayons before waiting for an answer and doodled on the teacher.

Since the teacher was squirming under her grasp which made her doodles strange, she duct-taped him to the floor.

"Stop moving already! I want to doodle on you!"

The teacher somehow got free (*cough*army knife*cough*that he*cough*got from somewhere*cough*) and ran out the room.

"Aw, he escaped…Kaboom," Turquise said before turning to face the class and giving them an innocent smile before sitting down next to Kirihara.

* * *

"Please come in, Kaji-san," the teacher called.

Everyone in the class turned their heads towards the door.

"Um…Kaji-san?"

No answer.

"Right, now we know that the new student won't be coming into our class any time soon so now we shouldn't care. Let's start our lessons now. He doesn't really matter."

The class heard an explosion and then carried on with their lessons.

* * *

"Aqua! There was a bully in my class!" Turquise cried. It was lunch-time and the first thing Turquise did was to run to Aqua's class.

"There, there, Turquise, what did he do? I'll murder him in the most painful manner," Aqua smiled evilly.

"The monster…He made fun of me and took my crayons and then…And then his eyes turned red and then I unleashed an army of clothes hangers at him and then he tried to kill me by using tennis!"

"He's going to die," Aqua said before she left the class.

When Aqua had left, Tsubasa came into the class. "What happened?" he asked Turquise.

"Aqua's going to beat-up scary-face dude!" Turquise answered.

"Want to go watch?"

"Sure!"

A teacher passed by the class. "Want to go bother the teacher first?"

"Yep!"

* * *

Aqua was in the tennis courts with Kirihara.

"You made fun of my friend, and now I'm going to kill you," Aqua said.

Kirihara gulped. There was an evil aura behind her.

"Hold on a minute! It's not fair that you're going to beat me up! I have tennis practice now. You're going to waste, like, half an hour of my time!" Kirihara reasoned.

"You're a boy. What's so unfair about that?"

"True."

"I'll serve first."

Aqua pulled out the half-dead body of Kaji from her bag and used a lot of rope and duct-tape to tie him up into a ball and served him.

"You're not going to use a normal ball?" Kirihara asked.

"Yeah, this is more fun anyways. Besides, this way I don't have to walk to that basket over there to get balls."

They had their death match and then Aqua won 6-0. (1)

"Good game. Now all I need to do now is to make sure Kaji's dead."

"Um…Wasn't he the student that didn't show up in Sanada's class?"

Aqua adverted her gaze before answering, "Maybe."

* * *

"!!!" a random teacher screamed before jumping out the window.

"He's trying to commit suicide."

"Is that the last teacher?" Turquise asked. Tsubasa nodded.

"Oh well, shall we go find Aqua and Kaji and ask them if they want to join us in annoying the principal?"

"Of course! Principals have candy in their offices!"

They nodded to each other before running in opposite directions to find Aqua. If there's Aqua, there's Kaji.

* * *

"I found Aqua first," Turquise said.

"Yes, you did. Now where's the principal's office?" Tsubasa said.

"The easiest way to get to the principal's office is to make very loud and distracting noises so that we can get the principal's attention and get sent to his office," said Aqua.

"So…" Everyone looked at Kaji.

"What are you looking at me for?"

* * *

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Kaji screamed.

"Give me my chocolates or your doll gets it," Aqua said in a very threatening voice. She's scary.

"Never!"

"Then…" Aqua cut the doll's head off.

"!!!!!"

"What's all this ruckus about?" the principal asked.

"We were told to do this by Kirihara. He said that if we don't he'll kill us all!" Turquise answered.

The principal grew angry. "AGAIN?! THAT'S THE SECOND TIME THIS WEEK! THAT'S IT. CALL HIM HERE."

"Okay!"

Kirihara was called to the principal's office and Aqua, Turquise, Kaji and Tsubasa stalked him. They found the principal's office and Turquise drew a map of it with her crayons, but the picture looked more of a doodle than a map. Ah well, another thing to bother the psychiatrist about.

"So, we'll come back here his meeting with Kirihara is over?" Kaji asked.

"No, _we_ will come. You'll be locked up in a box with my pet gorilla," Aqua answered.

"Since when have you gotten a pet gorilla?"

"Since last night when Turquise and I were experimenting on something to make carbon dioxide into a bunny. We didn't get a bunny. We got a gorilla."

"I see. Bye." Kaji ran off somewhere away from them.

"Aqua, you're not going to chase him?" Turquise asked.

"Nah, I've got one of his dolls. He'll come back if he doesn't want to see it hurt."

"Okay then. Want to bother the tennis team here while we wait for him?"

"Sure."

* * *

They arrived in the tennis courts soon after.

"AQUA!! GIANT BEES ARE PLANNING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD AND THEY ARE NOW PRACTICING THEIR FIGHTING SKILLS WITH STICKS AND BALLS!!!" Turquise shouted.

"Turquise, they're not bees. They are just this school's students wearing their tennis uniforms. And their sticks are called racquets and their balls, tennis balls," Tsubasa explained.

"I don't see the difference."

Tsubasa heaved a sigh. "Never mind, hopefully you'll understand when you're older."

"Like where babies come from?"

Aqua and Tsubasa tensed. "Err…Yeah, that too."

Aqua tried to change the topic before Turquise asks where babies came from. "Turquise, that's Niou and Marui. They are in my class. Marui likes to eat candy and Niou can't stop saying 'Puri'."

"Want to do something to make him say something other than 'Puri'?" Turquise asked.

"Hm…This'll be easy. Is Sharky in your bag?" Aqua asked.

"I think he's in Tsubasa's."

Tsubasa ransacked his bag that was conveniently on his bag and pulled out a shark.

"Thank you," Aqua said to Tsubasa before heading off to the courts. "Hey Niou!"

Niou turned. "Puri?"

"If you say 'Puri' one more time, Sharky will eat you, do you understand me?" Aqua said in a very threatening voice.

Niou just nodded.

"Good. Now say something."

"Something."

"Good! Your life will be spared today."

Turquise came running toward Aqua. "Aqua and Niou's getting married!"

They started to choke. Tsubasa laughed. Kaji was lost. Everyone stared.

"Turquise, what did you just say?" Aqua gasped.

"I said that Aqua and Niou are getting married later."

"Turquise! You remembered his name? IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!!"

"No, Tsubasa told me just now."

"I see," Aqua said, "Now that that is all cleared up, WE ARE NOT GETTING MARRIED!!!"

Turquise began fake-crying.

Kirihara came back into the courts. "Niou, the principal's hair turned green after I left, what did you do?"

"Puri." Niou heard growling behind him. He turned and saw Sharky behind him.

"I mean, I won't tell you."

"Niou! You _said _something. IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!!!"

* * *

"Mister Principal, why is your hair green?" Turquise asked.

"A certain prankster did this to me."

"Was it…That man…With the rainbow hair and cheerleading outfit?"

"What?"

"Never mind."

"Anyways," Aqua said, changing the topic, "We just want to know why all the teachers tried t ocommit suicide and why they kept calling Turquise and Tsubasa crazy."

"Well, I am a licensed psychiatrist. I think I can help," he said.

"Okay!" Turquise said.

"What problems do you have?" he asked Tsubasa.

"Well, my plants die every now and then because of her exploding them." He glared at Turquise. Aqua swiped candy from the bowl on his desk into a sack.

"I see, but no one these days care about plants anymore, and so won't I. Next, what about you, Turquise?"

"I have a 'why' problem."

"A 'why' problem? What do you mean? Do you mind explaining it to me?"

"Why?"

"So that I can help you with your problem."

"Why?"

"So that I can help find out what makes you strange to the other teachers."

"Why?"

_FIVE SECONDS LATER_

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" The principal jumped out the window.

"Bye-bye Mr. Principal!" Turquise shouted, waving her hands at the silhouette of the running principal.

"Got all the candy?" Tsubasa asked Aqua.

"Sure did."

"Where's Kaji?"

"He's probably dead by now."

"You have the Nuriko Special?"

"Yeah."

"I see."

* * *

**A/N: Sorry, I know that this is a very long chap. I couldn't help it. It's fun writing this story. ^^**

**For those of you who were wondering, 'Mitsukake' is the name of a celestial warrior in Fushigi Yuugi. Just pretend that he is Aqua's older brother…Or at least the reincarnation of him…Never mind, you'll find out later. So, picture Mitsukake from this story as the Mitsukake from Fushigi Yuugi.**

**PLEASE REVIEW! **


	3. Hyoutei

**A/N: Third chap~ **

**Ooh and I'd like to thank anonymous for being my first flamer! Thank you! Ah well, now that that's over with, !!!**

**Anyways, enjoy!**

* * *

"I can see the light!" Aqua said.

"NO! DON'T GO INTO THE LIGHT!!!" Turquise shouted at her friend.

"Turquise, if we don't, how are we supposed to go to school? Block out the sun?"

"We have to die to go to school?! That's pure torture! Why do we have to go to school then?"

"You're right, why do we have to go to school if it kills us?" Aqua turned to look at Mitsukake.

Mitsukake sighed. Clearly, these girls would do anything they could to get themselves away from school.

"Tsubasa, Kaji, help me, please," Mitsukake said. He hoped that those two could help him with this.

The said two were about to say something before they were silenced by a death-glare from Aqua and a really scary aura from Turquise's bunnies that were behind Turquise.

They ended up hiding behind a statue of a flying monkey.

"Go. To. School," Mitsukake said.

"Yadda!" said Aqua.

"Go. To. School. Now!!!"

"Yadda!"

Mitsukake screamed before jumping into a cannon and blasting off to the moon.

"Meh, let's just go to school to create havoc since we have nothing better to do now."

Everyone nodded their heads at Aqua's suggestion.

Since no one was there to drive them to school and they were too lazy to walk, they thought of a way to travel without using up their energy and didn't contribute to global warming.

They got all of Turquise's bunnies together and sat on them as they walked…Well, crawled, to school. (1)

* * *

"Ore-sama!!" some crazy hyper-active rapid fangirl yelled.

This was completely normal, but the fact that she was shouting at a toy monkey hanging from a porcupine made all normalness disappear.

"Erm, Aqua, I think she needs to visit the doctor…"

"No, she needs to visit the therapist."

"Can we go to the therapist later?"

Tsubasa and Kaji sighed. Meh, at least they'll get more candy.

Aqua nodded and then they left the psycho fangirl shouting at a squirrel.

* * *

"Ore-sama thinks we should practice more often," Ore-sama said.

The fangirl from before squealed.

"But Atobe, how are we supposed to practice more often if the tennis courts are being occupied by the puppies and cactuses?" Gakuto asked, looking at a few puppies running around cactuses in the Hyoutei tennis courts.

Oshitari suddenly appeared behind Gakuto. "We'll think of something later. Right now, does anyone have a way to get rid of them?"

Gakuto did a back-flip and a few somersaults.

Everyone called him a show-off and threw puppies and cactuses at him that were so conveniently nearby.

There's his answer.

* * *

"I think I'm lost," Turquise said after walking twenty circles around Atobe.

Atobe glared at her. He was very annoyed. "Ore-sama is very annoyed." See?

Aqua's dark aura loomed over Atobe. "Say one more word and you're tad-pole food."

Atobe gulped and fainted. The next thing he knew he was on a hospital bed got jumped on in the you-don't-wanna-know by a huge first grader.

First the occupied tennis courts, then the scary transfer student and now _this_. This was not his day.

* * *

"How long will Atobe be hospitalized?" Shishido asked.

"I think it'll be another few seconds before they let him free," Oshitari replied.

"Okay then, so, while waiting do you want to see if I can make Jirou wake up and stay awake for five seconds before you make Kabaji say something other than 'usu'?" Shishido asked Gakuto.

"You're on!"

They began looking for a referee. They noticed Tsubasa by a few plants.

"Hey, you must be the new transfer student," Shishido said.

Tsubasa didn't hear him. He was busily admiring the patterns on the soil.

Shishido then got a bullhorn from somewhere and shouted into it.

Tsubasa jumped and Gakuto did as well.

"Hah! I jumped higher than you!" Gakuto said.

Tsubasa landed flat on his face. "What do you want?"

"Will you referee for us? We're having a competition to see if I can keep Jirou awake for five seconds before he gets Kabaji to say something," Gakuto said.

Tsubasa said yes and followed them into the Hyoutei storage room.

* * *

"You know, I don't feel like we've done anything wrong," Aqua said.

"We didn't," said Turquise.

"This isn't right! We should have gotten half the school hospitalized or something by now!" Aqua shouted, "And Kaji hasn't even died once throughout the day!!"

Several students turned to look at Aqua. "She's got shouting-at-the-top-of-his/her-voice-for-no-reason-and-about-nothing syndrome," Turquise explained.

They shrugged and continued on whatever they were doing.

"I need someone to take my anger out on," Aqua said.

She saw Atobe walk into the school building and thus, Atobe became her new torturee.

* * *

_We would like to interrupt this story to inform you that Jirou killed Gakuto and Kabaji knocked Shishido out for bothering him. Thank you for your attention. _

_CRASH_

Now _Kabaji killed Shishido._

_Once again, thank you for your attention._

* * *

…

…

…

…

"WHY IS EVERYONE SO QUIET?!?!?!" Gakuto shouted.

Everyone stared, wide-eyed with disbelief. Gakuto came back to life again.

"We thought you were dead," Oshitari explained.

"Well I'm not! See? I'm talking to you right now, breathing and stinking! Smell my armpits, people!"

Everyone began vomiting and somehow, Aqua disguised Kaji as a bucket.

"So…Much…Puke…" Kaji said. He was covered in vomit.

"Aqua here revived you, but in return, she killed Atobe and then brought him back to life. And then killed him again. You're lucky she didn't kill you again…With a box of cereal, right Kabaji?" Oshitari explained…Again.

"Usu."

Gakuto cocked his head to look behind the vomit-covered Kaji. He could see Aqua experimenting something, Turquise and Tsubasa playing a game of 'Die' and the other regulars were staring at the three of them…Aqua was experimenting on ways to kill Atobe with normal everyday objects.

"Erm, thank you?" Gakuto said.

Aqua nodded and continued on with a jackhammer.

Gakuto sighed. "What happened to Shishido?"

Aqua became confused and got her bazooka out. "Was that the frog that was licking your feet?"

"A FROG WAS LICKING MY FOOT?!?!?!" Gakuto screamed.

"Really? I thought it was a toad," Oshitari said.

"Maybe it's both a frog and a toad!" Turquise exclaimed. Everyone sweatdropped.

"No, Shishido is the person you picked up and defenestrated."

Kaji and Tsubasa stared at Aqua in disbelief, "You _threw _someone out the _window?!?!_"

Aqua said yes and sent Kaji to look for Shishido.

They found him in his class, attacking a chair with an empty water bottle. He was sent to the school psychiatrist after.

* * *

Aqua, Turquise, Tsubasa and Kaji were called to the principal's office. Oh and so were Kabaji and Jirou.

"Kabaji, I heard you killed Gakuto. Is that true?" the principal questioned.

'Usu' was all the principal could get out of him before getting so angry he puked on Kaji.

Jirou slept, and slept, and slept. Geez, he's so lazy!

Kaji was escorted out of the room by a dancing gorilla. Why do they have a dancing gorilla in their school anyways?

"Anyhow, Gakuto is still surprisingly alive. Care to tell me why?"

Turqusie's hand shot up. "I think the gorillas scared him and he woke up?"

Aqua raised an eyebrow. "If they did, why would have the gorilla's done?"

"Shown off their ugliness underneath those cute faces and proposing to them?"

Everyone in the room, save Turquise, slapped their forehead.

"Never mind," Aqua said.

"Never ask Turquise to explain anything," Tsubasa whispered to the principal.

It was already two in the afternoon and the principal still hasn't gotten an answer out of Kabaji. This was going to be a long, long day.

* * *

When the principal finally gotten an answer out of him, he was so shocked at him not saying 'Usu' but real words. The principal committed suicide and let everyone go. Aqua and co. didn't even bother to revive him. She thought he tried to kill Fur-Fur, her pet dog-cat-thingy.

After hearing what the principal did, Mitsukake asked to transfer Aqua, Turquise, Tsubasa and Kaji out of the school.

After doing so, police came and arrested the gorilla as it was the number one suspect on the principal's death.

Kaji fell asleep in the car and was drenched in vomit once again by Aqua.

"You know, we didn't really do much here. All the teachers were absent and that meant no classes and we didn't even drive one person crazy! I hate that Kabaji. If he hadn't shocked the principal into suicide, we might have done that!" complained Aqua.

"And I didn't even got to doodle on a teacher!!" Turquise whined.

Mitsukake replied, "I thought you hated school."

Aqua shook her head. "I did, but…"

"Ah well, this just means no more school!" Kaji cheered before saying some colourful words and earning a bucket of vomit from Aqua. "Stop that already! It's annoying, ya know?"

"Say one more thing and ninety-nine buckets of vomit will fall on your head."

Kaji kept quiet.

"Where do you get all the vomit from?" Turquise asked. She was curious to know where she get an unlimited supply of vomit.

"Amusement park. They collect these things." (3)

Kaji groaned and was covered in puke and saliva in seconds.

* * *

**A/N: I know that this is shorter than usual, please bear with me. I'm short on ideas.**

**Don't try this at home, please. My classmate's brother sat on a rabbit and squished it…Please don't. Save the rabbits.**

**AquaWatercrest's story 'How to Get Rid of Atobe'.**

**They don't really. **

**PLEASE REVIEW!!**


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